Self Pity

 Self Pity

 

I'm not sure I can do this anymore. I'm not well and I don't seem to be getting better. I'm weak and can barely walk. 

 

There's so much that needs to be done and I'm not sure I can do it all. Frankly, I'm not sure If I can do any of it on my own. 

 

Depression? Maybe just being overwhelmed. Very overwhelmed. 

 

I thought I'd have help but I was lied to. Not for the first time. Knowing me it won't be the last.

 

I need to make decisions. Do I sell up and go into assisted living? Do I try to hang on? If I sell up what will happen to the furbabies? Where will I go? Do I try to find another place to live? 

 

Too many questions. Not enough answers. 

 

All I seem to do is sleep and sit. I need to get up and do it. Something. Anything. Be like a Nike commercial and “just do it”.

 

I have a hard time asking for help but I'm going to have to start. I need a lot of help. I just don't know how to start asking and who to ask.

 

Maybe I should break things down into small tasks and make a list to check off what I've accomplished. Sounds too much like an IEP but maybe that's what I need. Just do it.

(231)

The Racing Dog

 GYWO JUNE CHALLENGE: GREEN WITH GRAFFITI

Prompt: Dog-racing

The Racing Dog

Over the centuries many types of dogs have been used for sport. Hunting and racing are just the two more popular uses. 

Racing dogs, like horses, are bred for speed. The most common breed of dpg used is the greyhound. Greyhounds are sleek, long legged and focused on the goal of getting the stuffed thing they all chase. 

Most dogs are well fed and well cared for but some are not. Owners over-breed the females and race the males until they drop. Some have even been euthanized when they can no longer be used for racing. The racing dog is not guaranteed a good life.

In more recent years, a program for rehoming former racing dogs. This gives them a few years of love and comfort before they die. Not all dogs find a home that understands their particular needs.

Is racing dogs ethical? It's only ethical if the needs of the dog are put above the need for the owners to win. In most cases, it is not. Laws are in place but there is no guarantee that they are followed.

Should dog racing be banned? That would be a debate for another day. The dogs should be the primary concern when making that decision. 

(209)

Documents

 Photo 17 Burning letters or documents with a map matches and magnifying glass

The documents must not fall into the hands of the enemy. The soldier had traveled far and fought bravely to bring these documents across the front lines. 

Unfortunately, he was killed by mortar fire. His body was under a tarp in the old barn. 

The woman held the match in her hand ready to strike. She hesitated. If she destroyed them now, the soldier would have died in vain. 

She stuffed the documents into her corset and followed the map to the soldier’s final destination. Who would suspect a woman carrying a basket of fresh eggs? She needed to be careful all the same.

(104)

Power

 Photo 48 Crumbled altar in concentric circles in a valley

It was the place of the old gods. Older than the dwarves. Older than the fae. 

The ground itself vibrated with an ancient and sacred power. The power increased as the rings grew smaller and the power was the greatest at the crumbling altar. 

The high priestess let the power fill her as she walked with her offering to the altar. She took a deep breath and let the power fill her lungs. 

At the altar, she put the basket of fruit and grains down. She held a rowan wand high in the air. She whispered an ancient spell then left the circle smiling as she went. 

(107)

Clouds

 Photo 51 Child on a ladder pointing at a cloud

I wonder what it would be like to touch a cloud. To reach up and feel its fluffy softness. 

But a cloud is not a cotton ball. It is a mist of water and air. Not dry or fluffy. No soft bunnies or puppies floating in the sky, just the promise of rain. 

But rain can be nice too. A soft cascade of rhythmic drops on a tin roof. Rain can also disappoint. Hard. Cold. Drenching. Rain is a fickle thing. 

I wonder what it would be like to touch the sky. Somehow I don't think it would be as wonderful as I wish it could be. 

(107)