Self Pity

[sidhe_faerie]

 Self Pity

 

I'm not sure I can do this anymore. I'm not well and I don't seem to be getting better. I'm weak and can barely walk. 

 

There's so much that needs to be done and I'm not sure I can do it all. Frankly, I'm not sure If I can do any of it on my own. 

 

Depression? Maybe just being overwhelmed. Very overwhelmed. 

 

I thought I'd have help but I was lied to. Not for the first time. Knowing me it won't be the last.

 

I need to make decisions. Do I sell up and go into assisted living? Do I try to hang on? If I sell up what will happen to the furbabies? Where will I go? Do I try to find another place to live? 

 

Too many questions. Not enough answers. 

 

All I seem to do is sleep and sit. I need to get up and do it. Something. Anything. Be like a Nike commercial and “just do it”.

 

I have a hard time asking for help but I'm going to have to start. I need a lot of help. I just don't know how to start asking and who to ask.

 

Maybe I should break things down into small tasks and make a list to check off what I've accomplished. Sounds too much like an IEP but maybe that's what I need. Just do it.

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