Stressing Out. 11/12

[sidhe_faerie]

 I don't know what it is but I feel unsettled. I can't seem to concentrate and I really need to right now. I have so many things that need to get done and I can't seem to focus enough to get anything done. 

I've considered that I may be on the cusp of a manic phase. I'm certainly due one. It's been a while. My bipolar cycles very slowly so my depression lasts a while before I get a shorter manic phase. However, it doesn't feel like it usually does when I get my manics.

I am an empath so it could be that. Too many people are worried and frightened in the world right now with everything that's going on in the country and the world. I like to think that I'm far enough into the woods where it wouldn't effect me but I'm not going to rule it out. The amount of people and the strength of emotions could carry all those vibrations back here to me in the woods. 

I also considered that it might be cosmic. The veil thinned at Samhain and it doesnt feel like the doorway closed. Im trying to block those feelings but Im not having any success with it. The retrograde is over. Things should be getting better but it feels like the universe is stuck somehow. Im not sure if this is real or my over stimulated brain but everthing feels wrong right now. 

I can't sleep either and that always makes me anxious. Let's face it I love to sleep and when I can't it affects my mood. I get cranky and bitchy. It doesn't take much to get me upset when I'm tired.  

My pain levels have increased lately too. The fibromyalgia and joint pain have been really bad in the last two months. I'm limping again with a swollen knee. I can't seem to get the swelling to go down. I have a feeling that when winter sets in it will only get worse. 

I sound like I'm whining but I really don't like to be stressed out. It makes me even more stressed out. Talk about vicious cycles. I think I'm going to take a deep breath and try to calm the hell down. Maybe two or three breaths…... 

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