sidhe_faerie | What I learned About My Writing in 2020 (Reply)

What I learned About My Writing in 2020

This was the most depressing and devastating year I have ever lived through. That's saying something. I've been around a long time. The world was on fire and nothing could be done to put it out. I'm really hoping 2021 is a real change for the better.

My mojo is gone.

Let's face it. The writing is on the wall. My years of 350K word counts are over. It seems I've lost my mojo for those epic big bangs and edgy one shots. I just don't feel I have it in me anymore. Im hoping to find it again and do it sooner rather than later.

I'm too easily distracted.

Yarn. Streaming services. Real life. You name it, it distracted me. I need to find focus and that isn't going to be easy right now. There's too many things to worry about. Too many things I let worry me as well. Trust me, right now it's not that hard to find something else to do when I really should be writing.

I lack motivation.

I could sign up for every fest and big bang there is and I still can't find the motivation to get anything done. I have to make myself write most of the time. It's the only way I get any words on a doc these days.

On a side note…...

My physical and mental health is becoming more of an issue than it was before. My bipolar has always been annoying but recently it's stuck on the low end of the cycle. Not that I like my manics, I don't, but I would like to be a little closer to one than dragging the bottom of depression. Depression makes me sleep….and sleep….and sleep. Sleeping is great but it makes it hard to do anything else and it affects my fibromyalgia by causing flare ups. I don't need anymore flare ups, that's for sure.

My vision seems to be getting worse and that's the biggest issue. I think it's time to go beg or bribe some poor doctor to do the surgery I hoped I would never need but knew was coming. The computer screen and even my tablet have become difficult to use. The glare makes seeing the screens almost impossible. I think this is most of my problem and I need to get it fixed a.s.a.p..

I would write by hand but my handwriting is so bad I can't even read it. I flunked penmanship. Yeah, I really did. Don't laugh. It's worse than a doctor's and it looks more like a chicken looking for food. A blind chicken with only two toes on his left foot.

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